Card reading was a hobby of mine until I recently decided to read for others. When you start reading for others, it’s a little bit less funny and slightly more serious (especially when the cards are ugly) because you have a responsibility to the person that you’re reading for.
The first time I read for someone it was a former boss of mine, and it was many years ago now. She had gone through a very bad breakup with someone she’d dated for many years. I read tarot cards and saw someone coming in to her life that she didn’t know. She had been hoping to become involved with a man we worked with, but I didn’t think it was him. A few months later she met the person I described (the details were correct) and they eventually wound up getting married. At that point, I retired my cards and didn’t read again for many years. The experience frightened me.
It’s not always a blessing to get a glimpse of the future. I tend to work very hard to block a lot because it tends to leave me unsettled. I’ve made tepid explorations of what my gifts are, and very quickly retreated from them.
I took now as an opportunity to write about this subject because it seemed appropriate. I predicted something, and I was wrong. It kind of makes me feel bad, but the good thing is I was reading for my husband and it was a frivilous question. But it’s important to note that there is no such thing as being 100% accurate in predicitng anything.
I often see claims like this and I can recall contacting people who made such claims (many of whom had sparkling feedbacks full of accolades). The person I was speaking to may have been very pleasant, but I didn’t get the impression that they were sharing anything with me that I didn’t tell them, or anything that was specific enough where they could make a mistake. It’s a matter of “buyer beware”.
Tarot readers, psychics and fortune tellers often get a bad rap – they’re viewed as fringe elements and charlatans. In some cases they are. In a lot of cases, they’re not. Many of people I have “met” over the years who also are enthusiastsof the esoteric tend to be caring souls. They have different personalities – some are rather ethereal, some quite down to earth. But they tend to share a desire to help other people. That’s why predicting the future becomes such a tricky business. Especially when you’re wrong.
I’ve withdrawn from reading for a little while because I need to re-group. It’s something to think about, and something I have discussed with several trusted friends. I have been having great difficulty because I am so very concerned about the possiblity that something I say might cause someone to make a decision that they later regret. Because I am not going to be right all the time, and many times people call looking for hope….
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October 26, 2008 at 2:06 pm
phoenixoracle
Hi Tessa,
This is a very good topic, and speaking with Sylvie, it is a big responsibility, and not as glamorous as one might think. I remember having that little fantasy of sitting in a quaint little cottage, at a round table and having clients sit across. And hoping that what the cards say, was a bright beautiful future, but then the thought, “what would happen, if I saw something not so nice” eg, the man they are in love with, seen straying with a close friend’ How would we let them down nicely? “I see your partner, very close to a friend of yours?” And then of course, like you say, make a very wrong prediction, one person naturally tells 3 others and the ripple effect goes on and on..
I think that is one reason, I don’t have that confidence to read for others, “What if I got it wrong?” I’ve been to many readers over the last 20 years, and a few are 80% accurate, some under. I think we expect alot of these people, we want them to spell out every detail, and some days they are not going to be on all of the time. We are only willing to listen to the things we want to know or see. And the truly spendid things they tell us, we hang on to, and when it doesn’t happen, we blame the psychic.
Maybe the only way we can cover ourselves is by telling them, “this is for entertainment purposes only” what is seen today, could change tomorrow”
I think that’s why if we learn a system that has a simple step by step process, we generally can’t go wrong. I think that is why I like Sylvies ‘no layout” spread. And that is why I felt it was important to learn from her in person, it sort of speeds up the process (well generally) but I don’t think there is any quick way to do it, and takes years or practise and dedication. From talking with Sylvie, she is so dedicated to her profession, she went and learnt all aspects of business, finance, law, real estate etc, so that she could talk the talk when she dealt with clients of that profession.
But at the end of the day, if it is your true path to be a “card consultant’ and help guide people along their path, there will always be a situation that pulls you back on track, you might have a rest for a few months, but then you end up pulling your deck out again.
I think with you questioning yourself, it tells me that you are dedicated to your craft, because you are considering other people by wanting to give them the best service you can give. The ones, who carry on, who think 50% is good enough, and still take peoples money, well you can see who is “true” and who is not. How do you break that little block? You are the only one holding you back…nothing else. Have a break Tessa, refresh yourself, trust yourself again….and carry on!!
Phoenix
October 27, 2008 at 8:47 am
lacontessa
Thank you for your lovely and very well thought out comment Phoenix! I think you conveyed my fears more eloquently than I did.
I believe that when you are ready you will make a wonderful and very ethical reader. I personally think the ethics are so very important – you can have a very accurate reader with none and wind up with a series of disasters.
I thought about it, and there have been many occasions where I simply said to the person I was reading for “I don’t understand what I’m looking at” and tried to give them key words. I don’t like to sound uncertain, but I would rather be honest than wrong, lol… And I do have a disclaimer posted on my page. I really recommend putting one out there. Because it’s so important that people are aware of their responsibility to make their own decisions….
Thanks so very much for sharing your thoughts!
Contessa
October 28, 2008 at 3:53 am
Sammie
Dear Contessa,
One can tell from reading your post how seriously you have considered this decision. It is really a wise one if you aren’t entirely comfortable with other people taking what you see in the cards as absolute truth.
The points you’ve brought up are exactly the ones that come into my mind when I think about reading for others and why I’ve never started to do it – afraid I’d do more harm than good. Many of the people who consult card readers are so anxious for good news that one wonders what they might do if they hear otherwise.
Since the death of my cat and her five kittens, I’ve not been able to do any reading that might predict the future. All of my card reading has been for present insights and inspiration.
It amazes me that some card readers actually claim accuracy rates – how can one every know! Do they get back with every single person they read for to see how things worked out.
You are such a caring and kind person, Contessa. Perhaps, someday, you will feel like reading for people again and then you can state from the beginning that you just read to give insight not to look into the future.
Love,
Sammie
November 16, 2008 at 3:37 pm
Chanah
Nobody’s 100%, Contessa. But that doesn’t mean you should give up reading. Just make sure your clients know that you get it wrong sometimes – other professionals are allowed mistakes – even doctors, psychologists, scientists. And we don’t call them frauds if they make a wrong call. Why readers should be held to an impossible standard (at least the ones who don’t claim perfect accuracy) is beyond me, as is the idea of a client thinking a reader will always, always be right.
Sammie, I am deeply sorry about what happened to you, and please don’t take this the wrong way – but I’ve seen it happen again and again when somebody does have a real gift. They do a reading. It’s dead accurate. And then they stop – because – it really works? It did all along. I know you need some time, but I hope you’ll come back to predictive work one day.
Meanwhile, you can both certainly still read for people, and be of some use to them – lots of people do non-predictive readings, and lots of people find non-predictive readings to be very helpful. Just be clear about what you’re doing.
I was looking back through my own blog lately, and came across a mostly non-predictive spread I’d created – nearly forgot about it, but if you ever want to use, adapt, or do otherwise with it, give it a shot. I’d just hate to see either of you give up on readings. The folks who claim to never fail – them I could do without! But not you two – you both care too much, and that’s the kind of folks we need in this business.
Here’s the spread: http://36cards.wordpress.com/2008/05/23/lenormand-problem-solving-spread/
{{{{hugs}}}}
Chanah